Why Money Feels So Hard

Money brings up all sorts of emotions in us - overwhelm, fear, shame, guilt, anger, confusion.

Wouldn't it be great if instead of these emotions, it make us feel - joy, excitement, determined, clear, confident.

How then, do you shift from one end of the scale to the other?

1. Challenging Your Beliefs around Money

Understand what your beliefs are.  Become consciously aware of them.  Write them down.

Our minds cling to the familiar - our survival instinct knows how to deal with what has kept us alive until now.  The thing is, while we living, we may not be thriving.  That is not the remit of our survival instinct though.

By becoming aware of this, and what our patterns and stories are is important.  They can be direct experiences, things we were told or witnessed.  And, they can be ancestral and related to how women have been perceived over thousands of years.

Don't try to resolve all of that to move forwards though.  Our minds need small changes, done regularly before it will accept something new.

Start by tuning in to how you think about money.  How does your body respond to your thoughts about money?

2. Get Clear on What You Want Money For

When we aren't clear on the direction we want to go, we lack focus, we procrastinate, our decisions aren't easy to make, and we often question the decisions we do make.

Many of us are following in the footsteps of our parents (or we are deliberately going in the opposite direction, but it's still not YOUR direction), or society, or some external influence.

Rarely do we take the time, or even realise and think about what we want for our lives.  Time passes and then the "how did I get here?" question comes.  For me that started in my late 30s, and became a booming voice by the time I hit my 40s.

I had been doing a lot of personal development, since my late 20s, so I was making mostly aligned decisions, however, they weren't overly conscious.  I was allowing my intuition guide me, which was great when I was single, however, when I met my husband and had to start making joint decisions, I needed more than "it feels right".

So, I make a deliberate effort to think about the life and lifestyle I wanted.  That influenced the financial decisions I made, and what I would and would not compromise on.

When you're clear, it makes taking the right action SO much easier.

Think about how your desired lifestyle feels, how it looks, how it sounds, how it tastes (yes, tastes), how it sounds (are there waves crashing or birds chirping, or traffic noises!).  Write it all down. 

Visualise it as clearly as you can!

3. Look at or Prepare a Workable Budget

The word "budget" always used to make me cringe.  To the point where, even now, I prepare to use the words "cashflow management".

Ultimately, you need to have a view of what money is coming in, and what money is going out.  And when.

If you're a business owner - your income fluctuates.  Some expenses are paid monthly, some quarterly, some annually.  Have this view for both your business finances and your personal finances.

Being able to see the ebbs and flows is important, and it's something you are MORE than capable of.

4. See Where You Can Make Better Decisions

Once you have the information in front of you, you're in a better position to make decisions about any changes.

Often we launch off into action to save money or invest, or buy something that will make certain things easier, without looking at what you already have and where it makes sense to make changes.

Can you consolidate some apps that you use?  Can you change phone plans?  Are you over or under insured, and have a chat with your insurance company about how they can save a loyal customer some money (you really have but to ask - it's amazing what discounts they can give you).

5. Take Action

This is nearly always the last step - actually DO the things that you have been working on the previous 4 steps.

And, when it comes to money, doing things regularly and consistently is the key.  Save regularly, invest regularly, review your cashflow (or budget) regularly.

The initial effort may seem like a lot, so do what you can bit by bit.  Managing it all after that becomes much easier and takes less time.